Wind of the Soul

Over the years, as I have worked to explore my total-self, I’ve discovered an occasional tendency to try and ignore or hide certain emotions and experiences. If something didn’t feel “proper” or if it didn’t seem to fit into a so called sublime spiritual state of being, then I found the need to repress or ignore it. And when I wasn’t forcing it back into the abyss where it came from, then I was feeling guilt or shame for thinking the thoughts and for taking the specific actions related to the thoughts.

For me, coming into a better understanding of my spiritual side has been amazing; however, it has also caused me to place a lot of undue, unnecessary stress and pressure upon myself. I think anyone that’s engaged in self-exploration and growth will eventually encounter some form of self-condemnation or judgment. As we tune into what we feel is a more aware, connected, conscientious state, it’s not uncommon to hold ourselves to an even higher standard than ever before regarding our past and present emotional responses and actions.

Despite the improved states of awareness we may have achieved through spiritual pursuits, we need to be cautious about denying any part of our human experience. Acknowledging our emotional tendencies and physical experiences is part of the journey. There comes a point, however, when it’s important to understand we must not only acknowledge, but eventually honor all of our feelings and experiences. To acknowledge is simply to recognize (with or without attachment), but in showing honor we are providing ourselves with a form of respect minus any critique.

I’m not saying we can’t or shouldn’t learn to make continuous choices which are more advantageous for ourselves as well as for others. But, I do believe it’s easy to wander into the trap of expecting our human aspects, tendencies and “faults” to fall away once we experience more pronounced inner growth. Because of these unrealistic expectations, we may begin to vehemently deny, repress and/or resent that side of us as it expresses itself. I believe this tendency is, in fact, where the damaging concept of sin stems from. We are definitely spiritual beings, but we are these beings while simultaneously having a human experience, in which there’s nothing sinful.

There are certain biological and physiological drives and responses that will always accompany this physical journey no matter how much enlightened knowledge we possess. That doesn’t mean we are victims, prisoners or unwitting pawns of the human vehicle. It only means it’s important for us to understand these functions for what they are and embrace them as we continue our own growth.

The sooner we can distance ourselves from the concept of having to live some imaginary, saintly, sterile life, just because we are on a spiritual journey, the better. I don’t think we should equate true spiritual awareness with feeling guilt or denial over any of our emotions and experiences. In fact, feeling guilty and sinful have about as much in common with spirituality as George Bush does with being considered a Rhodes scholar. Sorry, I couldn’t resist that one!

We have always been taught that fear and the repercussions from some external power (be it our parents, teachers, pastors, god, the long arm of the law, etc.) should keep our actions and thoughts in line. In other words, it’s ok to be ourselves, just as long as we measure up to a certain ideal or standard. Deviate from that standard and we’re up the creek (at least in the eyes of many). The problem with this logic is very evident- it teaches us to not honor our true feelings and it causes us to find shame in many of our actions.

Once again, I’m not encouraging anyone to break the law or mistreat others. I’m encouraging you to think about why you may feel compelled to not honor all of your emotions and actions, whether they’re deemed proper or improper by society or any form of spiritual or religious teachings. When we can learn to honor every part without judgment, I believe we will have a more whole, integrated, joyous experience. As our lives become more whole, we stop operating from fractured psychological and physical states.

Imagine a jigsaw puzzle. Every disconnected piece may contain snippets of beauty, but in its broken state it’s impossible to see the phenomenal, big picture. And to complicate things further, many of us decide to throw out our own life pieces that we feel no longer fit with our current self-image or understanding. However, when each piece is not only kept but acknowledged for what it is, honored and then joined together- an amazing scene unfolds.

Honoring who we are (even our supposed wrong doings) and leaving condemnation behind does not mean we are doomed to repeat our past, nor does it prevent our own internal and external growth. On the contrary, it enhances our growth. The most disconnected, diminished state of being is one that’s broken into a million pieces represented by fear, guilt, repression, regret and disassociation with our feelings and experiences. Bring your pieces together by embracing the human side (including all of its interesting parts) and joining it with the spiritual side. To ultimately understand they are both one gigantic, intertwined experience, without any real separation, is the ultimate state of honoring who you are.

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This entry was posted on Monday, August 11th, 2008 at 7:38 pm and is filed under Health and Well Being, Releasing Fear, Self-Help, Spiritual Empowerment. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.